Because I had nothing better to do on Sunday, I dragged myself off of the couch and went down to my local theater to catch an early screening of GI Joe.  I went in with the assumption that if I expected bad things I might be pleasantly surprised.  As it turned out, no amount of mental preparation could have spared me the boredom or squeezed one iota of fun out of this movie.

The plot is bad. The story is cookie cutter.  The character development is laughable.  The acting is piss-poor to shit awful.  The arch is non-existent.  The effects were terrible to serviceable, and the score was week.

If you’re 13 years old or under, then grab some sugar, and some carbonated sugar, and you’ll have a great time.  Everyone else should avoid this at all costs.  Take my advice and stay on the couch.

Neill Blomkamp has created a solid and entertaining sci-fi experience in District 9.  Even though this movie used a style that I still dislike (documentary shaky cam) it was done in a contained way so it did not detract from the move.  Instead of being lower quality with lots of compression and static – a-la documentary style – it was clean.   There were no HUD displays showing batter life or a film-safe frame.  The shakiness was still there but it was not forced upon you.

The effects in district 9 were amazing, especially considering its low budget.  The cg aliens in the movie look good and seemed to a have a real physical presence.  They also emoted surprisingly well which is a credit to the character designers and animators.

There are parts to the story that seemed a little made for television and a few strange oddities and plot inconstancies.  Also, because we’re thrown into this reality immediately and the entire back story is told through TV interviews, the story lacks some emotional punch as the only real development that happens is from people talking about other people.  There are relationships in this movie that don’t have enough build behind them so when they are used as emotional devices later on, the impact is lessened.

On the whole, District 9 is great movie missing some minor aspects that would have put it near the classics.  …Now - after seeing this – I really wish Neill would have made Halo.  Ahhhhhh well.

Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince

Yates is back in the director’s chair after a successful run at the last Harry Potter film.  He was able to bring hope back to the wizarding world after the terrible 4th installment of this franchise giant.  While I have yet to read a Harry Potter book, I felt that everything about this movie was done well.(at least pertaining to it’s prior films)  The acting, the story, the effects and the score, are all there, and while none of them are truly stellar, they are all well done.  I felt a tad unfulfilled at the end as I thought that the arch of this film had a smaller hill and thus a less rewarding pay off.  Even one of the film’s major revelations was not as impactful as I think the creators intended.  That being said, I understand what the film is which is a step up for a finally.
Unlike some of the other Harry Potter films, this one – while solid – will seem better when looked at as an installment rather then stand alone movie and maybe that’s the trick to squeezing more enjoyment out of a viewing.  I just hope the crew can deliver the goods after the tease.

 Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen

This is a horrific piece of shit that takes everything that was wrong with the first one and makes it 10 times worse.  There are tons of plot holes, nonexistent story and character development, needlessly offensive characters, and monumentally bad acting.  Even the effects which were the only good thing about this film are dampened by the terrible character design, and endless action sequences.  This two and a half hour, over-bloated monster is nothing more then Michael Bay jacking off his explosions button, and what makes it worse, is there seem to be far to many people that are more then happy to watch him go at it.

Bruno

Shallower and less genuine then Borat, this movie – while funny – felt staged and not as smart.  A lot of the laughs came from sex jokes and nudity rather then from akward and creative situations.  Ultimately I feel that Bruno is better suited for his usual 10 minuet sketches rather than an inflated hour and a half long movie.

The Hangover

This is a better then average comedy that has big laughs that build off of its hilarious premise.  This movie also benefits from its cast that is comprised of non big name actors.  It also has some tastefully done cameos that aren’t too distracting.  I would defiantly recommend seeing this film, and be sure to stay for the credits as there are some fantastically absurd photos that accompany them.

Raimi has been up to his ears in web slinging since 2002 and all though he as played roles in other horror franchises during this time, this is Sam Raimi’s true return to the director seat, and to horror genre.  Since he took his hiatus after creating the cult classic “Evil Dead” series, as well as the “Army of Darkness” fans have been waiting with baited breath for another installment of horror.   Surprisingly, “Drag Me to Hell” did not include one of the chief draws to the films of his past, Bruce Campbell.  So how did this latest boomshotless outing fair?

“Drag Me To Hell’s” story is nothing if not routine.  At it’s core there is a simple run of the mill setup reminiscent of movies/books like “Thinner.”  I would have liked to see Raimi delve more into the mythos of the curse he created but it was not to be.  Despite this somewhat cookie cutter setup, the execution of the film is so well done it can almost be forgiven.  Raimi does a nice job of blending the macabre with the gross, as well as with the just plain nasty.

Despite it’s masterful execution, “Drag Me To Hell” relies way to much on jump scares were the volume gets loud or something pops out of a shadow during a quite moment.  While I don’t mind these in small amounts, this movie was nothing but these.  I have never really been a fan of this type of scare and feel it to be the lazy mans was of prodding a reaction out of the audience. (but that’s just me.)

The other thing this film has lot’s of are gross out moments.  I won’t ruin anything for you but all of them have to do with every conceivable kind of body fluid other then blood.  These were fun for a while but the Gore lover in me really started to notice the film hitting the roof of its PG-13 rating after the 3rd of these, and the 8th jump scare.

Taking all of this into consideration, I would classify this as more of a comedy then anything else, and once I settled into this realization, I was able to enjoy myself, and curb my blood lust.  Also there was an entire row of girls sitting in front of my that would literally leap out of there seats and scream every 5 minuets, and this added tons of entertainment.

The makeup effects in “Drag Me To Hell’ are fantastic and work great in the movie.  The CG effects however are a little sub-par.  There were quite a few shots that didn’t look so great, though I guess if you compare them to his past horror films they are top of the line.

The music and sound in the movie is done well and I recommend that you see it in a theater with good sound and high/reference level sound volume.  There is one moment in particular that is nothing but sound effects and orchestra and it made me cringe and lean back in my seat.

In terms of acting, I thought that everyone in the film felt believable in there roles.  The only element that i felt was lacking was with the main character Christine Brown, played by Alison Loham.  She does a great job playing the protagonist and acting her part, but she lacks the charisma and off beat bravado that makes Bruce Campbell so fun to watch.

“Drag Me To Hell” works as a well constructed horror comedy, and while it’s overall presentation is solid it ultimately feels like Raimi bought a pre-made home, and covered it up with nice paint and lawn gnomes.  In other words…  Pretty to look at but not much inside.

Despite what I have said it truly is nice to have Raimi back in the horror mix.  Now if we can just get Peter Jackson back in the game.